Sports to me is as much of an opiate for the people as religion; I pay very little if any attention to sports, nothing bores me more. The sports section gets ripped out of my paper and used to wipe my feet on rainy days. But unless you’ve had your head jammed really far up your ass for the last five years or so you are probably aware of the Super Bowl being played this Sunday in nearby Arlington. For the record I couldn’t possibly care less who wins or loses but I will be so glad when it’s over.

The local news has been near un-watchable lately; you would think NOTHING ELSE in the entire world was going on. Oh that family that was gunned down in a home invasion last week in north Dallas gets a two minute mention. Those twenty families who lost their homes and possessions in that apartment fire last week? They get a quick mention and a sympathetic shake of the news-anchors heads.

Flocks of birds dropping from the skies for no apparent reason worldwide or massive fish-kills get an additional minute or two. The rest of the news however seems to come from some parallel plane of existence; a steroid-fueled Twilight Zone where everything is somehow tied in with the Super Bowl….imagine if you will…there’s the sign-post up ahead; it’s the Stupor Bowl!

And if the traffic jams won’t be bad enough on top of this media blitzkrieg of Stupor Bowl Fever-related HYPE, there’s the legions of pimps, hookers, con artists, hustlers, pick-pockets and Gawd only knows what other types of sleaze moving into the area to cash in on the Big Game. The Shitty of Arlington has red-light cameras at damn near every intersection, so they will be cashing in on this in a big way just on that alone. Needless to say not only am I not attending The Big Game, but will be avoiding the area at all possible costs this weekend.

What’s really irking me this year though is the Black Eyed Peas as the half-time act. I don’t know WTF picks the half-time acts for Super Bowl but aside from the Who they have been showing the musical taste of a smelly old wart-hog in recent years. Michael and Janet Jackson were bad enough but WHY the Black Eyed Peas?

Way back in the 80s there was an LP released anonymously by someone from Houston under the name Culturecide who basically were what sounded like a pair of Beavis and Butthead-sounding guys playing at-the-time popular Top40 records and yelling their own lyrics over them. One of them was We Are the World which resulted in a lawsuit and being banned from airplay by the FCC:

The Black Eyed Peas do basically the same thing; they “sample” other peoples music and yell over it and then release it under the premise of being “new music” Case in point: here is Dick Dale performing his hit “Miserlou”

NOW since I really didn’t want to decorate my site with the Black Eyed Peas is THIS instead just to prove my point:

I mean I don’t know; I’m just some working-class moron but why not just ONCE let KISS do the half-time show? They’ve been on the road for forty years or so; I think they’ve passed the test of time if nothing else. They’re big and loud and have the pyrotechnics that made the Who’s halftime show work as well as it did. And if you want to use the Who’s Hot argument, KISS has probably sold more records and CDs than those no-talent Peas. Oh well maybe next year. Sunday in the meantime I’ll be doing ANYTHING besides watching TV…. in the meantime here’s the Who:

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