I’m Back – Today At Least

Posted: May 2, 2010 in The Roper Files
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Started having problems about a month ago with viruses; last week the PC just all but shuts down.

Jump through the usual hoops: running scans, trying System Restore, download this, download that… Listen to the usual litany of useless advice:

 “You’re still running XP?”

 “You need Linux.”

 “You need a Mac.”

 “Forget it, man; just go buy a new computer with Windows 7

 Hmmm…great advice everyone. Only one problem here: after paying my rent and bills I have a grand total of thirty four dollars in my wallet. New computer this week? Don’t think so

Find a link on the Security Center for a anti-spy ware program that seems to work and so for a grand total of zero dollars and zero cents my antiquated year and a half-old desktop is functional again

 Don’t know about YOU but I’m getting sick and tired of having to engage in what seems to be a annual ritual now; the purging of The Old followed by the Immersion of The New. Or in other words having to buy new shit over and over.

My 10-year-old TV is crapping out. My home theater is out-dated. And now I find out my computer is outdated even though it’s not even two years old yet…. and I don’t have the money to replace all of this stuff.

 My grandmother had a refrigerator that she used for twenty years. My grandfather used the same lawn-mower for twenty five years.

Bought this computer as a Christmas present for myself in December of 2008. It was the last one on the shelf where I bought it that still had XP; all the others had Vista on them and everyone I knew that had Vista bitched about how terrible Vista was so I grabbed the one with XP.

Hadn’t had any problems with it for the last year or so. I surf the web and do word processing; my needs computer-wise are fairly simplistic. It’s not like I work for ILM or design video games; I just needed a computer that can handle text and pictures,that’s all.  Added a 500GB external hard drive so I would have lots of “storage space”; thought I was set.


April Fools Day was the day I started having problems with viruses. Spend the next thirty days running scans over and over and staring at the monitor. Get rid of one virus and another would pop up.

This game of Whack-A-Mole came to a head yesterday when I got up and turned on the PC to find a solid green screen instead of my usual desktop pattern.



Spend all morning long chugging coffee, running scans, re-booting….finally I find a link to a program that seems to corral and remove the viruses. Hooray!

Problem solved for today at least. But eventually I will have to go back on my hands and knees to Big Daddy Bill ( shown below)  and dole out even more money for my new improved version of Microsoft Crack if I still want my Internet experience.

 “Come on bitch. Admit it. You want it; you need it…”


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