The Horror of Real Life

Posted: October 25, 2007 in The Roper Files

Screw ghosts; screw goblins. Lemme tell you about something far more horrible. It’s called real life. Just got my so-called paycheck. Every goddam dime is already spent and as if that isn’t horrible enough, my boss just informed me that the only way I can make more money is to give up my Fridays off for the rest of the year. I’m as burned-out on my menial job as San Diego (what? too soon? Sorry.) Four ten-hour days of this torture just isn’t enough for my boss. I’ve got to put out “extra effort”.

God fucking dammit to hell…as much extra effort as WHO? Those do-nothing dildos he pays more money than me to stand around with their hands in their pockets shaking their heads at me like Jack Webb and criticizing my job performance? Big rough tough Harley-ridin’ MEN who scatter like a bunch of frightened game hens when they see me struggling with a piece of aluminum that weighs more than I do as opposed to oh, I don’t know…lifting a finger to help me. Or those Michelin Women he seems so fond of hiring that do absolutely nothing but stand around and talk all day?  I’ve never seen some of his favorite employees pull their hands out of their pockets, much less do any actual work. 

What a crock of shit. I don’t have a clue where my gas money is coming from for the next two weeks until my next check, much less the extra gas he expects me to burn up tomorrow for a few extra bucks I won’t see for two weeks. Guess there’s always siphoning gas from the neighbors cars. And then there’s the indignity of having to  get out of my nice warm bed in the morning and drive back up Idiot35 to that shithole and piss away yet another day of my life at that macro-managed circle-jerk. I’d rather eat live cancerous lab rats. May wind up doing it, too. I sure the fuck can’t afford to spend money of frivolities like going to the grocery store.

You can shove ghosts and goblins; real life is far, far more horrible. There’s nothing more nightmarish than under-employment. I need new glasses; can’t afford it. I need to spend money on my truck; can’t afford it. New clothes? Can’t afford it. And then there’s that Christian self-flagellation we’re all forced to go through once a year called Christmas I don’t have a dime saved up for coming up in a couple of months…bah, humbug already!

Think I’m in a bad mood? You don’t know the half of it….



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