STEENKO DE MAYO by Employee #666

Posted: May 11, 2007 in Best of file 23

FRIDAY May 11th…Thank God it’s Friday. Blessed, wonderful Friday. The beginning of my three-day weekend. Actually that’s bullshit; I walked off my job yesterday at noon. Caught up; nothing to do. They’ve hired everybody who’ve walked in the door for the last five months even though there’s no noticable increase in our work load. I’m probably going to hear all about it first thing Monday morning from my “superiors” at work for leaving early yesterday, but I don’t care.

Shouldn’t blog about the job; one of these days it’s going to bite me in the ass but Lawd Have Mussy…I’ve been with the same company for almost twenty years. I show up every day. I don’t take smoke breaks. I don’t stand around and talk on the phone.  I do every damn thing they tell me to do (as well as several things NO ONE asks me to do), and then they promote people around me like I don’t exist that do little more than stand around with their hands in their pockets and talk. THESE are the people my boss considers better than me. Biggest bunch of overpaid do-nothing dildos nobody should be forced to look at standing around forty hours a week. 

I would really, really love to hear what some of these assholes go home and tell their wives. ” Oh, honey what a HARD day! I shoved my hands in my pockets and then stood around and talked to the shipping/receiving girls and then I walked over to the coke machine and then I walked over to the candy machine and then I washed my hands and then I stared at on my computer and then I leaned on my tool box and talked on my cell phone and then I holed up in the bathroom for thirty minutes, blah blah blah…jerkoff jerkoff jerkoff…”

THIS is where your defense dollars really go folks, it ain’t the fucking troops that ever see a dime of the money. It’s do-nothing dickheads like the totem-pole management where I work. I would consider it nothing short of highway robbery to pay these goof-offs minimum wage to mow my yard. Sickening, utterly sickening. Nobody should have to live like this, nobody. But for three glorious wonderful days I don’t have to look at those pocket-fishermen.

It’s SO nice to sit here and peck away at my keypad instead of pissing away another day of my life at that macro-managed circle-jerk. Drinking fresh-ground bean coffee with real half and half creamer instead of that horse-trough Folgers with that yukko powdered chemo-creamer.

 And the sun is out today; hooray! Actually the sun comes out every day right after I get to work and then it starts to pour rain about the same time I clock out. It’s rained every night  for the last week, and they’re predicting rain for all next week. But today is beautiful. Almost caught up with my laundry. Need to go shopping, but I’m in no hurry today. The yard got mowed Monday and still looks good. Cleaned the house Sunday afternoon, it still looks fairly clean. I wish every day went this smooth. Good day to get off my pimply ass and go for a walk.  

 I love my days off. This is the only time life actually seems worth living. And Green Acres, the greatest TV series ever made is on TVLand.  LIfe is good. Until Monday morning anyways.


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