VOTE RIGHT OR ELSE by Cranky the Clown

Posted: August 21, 2006 in CRANKY the CLOWN

crankers2005.gif  (EDITORS NOTE: Cranky has been slightly elusive lately; we very rarely see him except when he comes around demanding spare change. Since we feel guilty about supporting his numerous bad habits, we tell him no unless he brings us a new article. When he realized we were serious this time, he finally coughed one up. So without further ado, here’s Cranky!)

Greetins cretins! Cranky the Clown here writing to you from the hot sweaty crotch of our great nation, Texas! 40 days straight of 100 degree heat and not one drop on rain; naw, there’s no global warming. Junk science, right?

Been hearing a phrase this week; democratic Taliban. Haw haw haw haw haw Oh stop it, you’re killing me! Democratic Taliban! Coming from a party that in the last few years has:

Unseated a Bronze Star-decorated Vietnam Vet Governor after a nasty smear campaign and replaced him with an Austrian who’s played a soldier in a couple of movies and had ZERO experience in any political office. 

Conducted a shameless smear campaign against John Kerry ( another Vietnam vet ) so they could install you-know-who for another utterly dreadful Four More Years. Remember those purple heart band-aids they wore so proudly at the 2004 GOP convention? An insult to all vets, and yet where was the outrage? There was none.

Look at the fudgy smear campaign they’re waging right now against Rep. John Murta, a good honorable man who served in Vietnam (unlike more than a few of his critics) but had the unmitigated GALL to voice the opinion of his constituents. If the GOP succeeds, they’re going to railroad him out of office too just like Kerry and Davis.

Is it just me? Am I the only sole American left who is totally nauseated by this bullshit? These bully-boy tactics are disgraceful at best. Joe McCarthy name-calling. You’re a Communist! You’re a friend of the Iraqi insurgency! You’re not an American! You don’t support the troops. Just some of the bullshit I’ve had to listen to via e-mail in the course of the last week alone from various people. KIss my dick each and every one of you know-it-alls.

How’s this for supporting the troops? I hope every one of them makes it back here alive and well and in one piece! And then I’d like to replace each and every one of them with you self-righteous assholes who call me a traitor, or un-American. YOU should go step on an IED for Bush and Elmer Fudd. If you know so damn much about who’s an American and who isn’t, go work for the highly under-staffed, under-budgeted, Border Patrol; they could use your help!

These people make me sick. Vietnam redux. Right vs.left; what’s the difference? They’ll do or say anything, and I mean anything to keep the public squabbling amongst each other. Getting people in a lather about stem cell research, abortion, gay marriage or my old favorite, flag burning!

I saw someone burn a flag. Once. At the 1984 Dallas GOP Convention, of all places. And they’ve been flogging that dead horse ever since. Oh yes, just look outside. The skies are black with all the smoke from those millions of burning flags RIGHT NOW.

Put down that remote, turn off that tv. Pull the headphones out of your ears. Put down that Blackberry. Put down that cellphone. Quit gambling online, quit looking at porn RIGHT NOW (it’ll be there later, I promise) and e-mail your local and state representatives. Demand accountability on the part of everyone from the interns up to the White House. Demand they re-open the 9/11 investigation. We already know what they knew and when they knew it; I repeat: demand accountability now! They’re already trying to pass legislation making Bush and Cheney immune from war crime charges. Just Say Nein. Demand accountablility! We’ve still got two years to impeach Bush and Cheney; demand impeachment proceedings before it’s too late! Tell your representatives you’re tired of riding the Titanic, or they’re next on your vote-against list. Don’t know about you, but if I go down first I’d rather do it kicking and screaming. Let’s raise Hell while we can…while we still have a voice and the chance!

 And for Gods’ sake, Just Say Nein to Arnold in 2008  

 Vote Cranky!

 Cranky the Clown August 2006


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